Christians who are sincere in
seeking God often wrestle with the question of knowing His will either for
their future or in a particular situation. There are those who believe that as
God controls everything they can just wait for things to happen around them
without taking action. At the other end of the spectrum there are those who
believe that as God has given us free will we can do whatever we want and there
is no right or wrong path. But which view is biblical?
Looking back over the years there
have been times when I have had to make major decisions. The pattern has tended
to be that it is only afterwards that I have seen that God was at work
directing me and keeping me in His will. I had to take steps of faith. At times
this was scary and involved an uncomfortable change of direction or a
relinquishing of something I had been holding onto.
In 2006, I decided that maybe God
wanted me to sell my flat and buy a house. I put my flat on the market and
prayed for a specific amount to be offered if it was right for me to sell it. I
really wasn’t bothered about the money but wanted to be sure that I was doing
the right thing. There was no movement for a few months and I began to think that
maybe I should lower the price—maybe God wasn’t aware of what I was doing or
needed a helping hand, maybe I hadn’t been specific enough for Him to
understand.
Really, I should’ve been thinking
that maybe it wasn’t right to move instead of doubting God’s capabilities. It
was something I had to work through, and then the offer came. But, although a
decent enough offer, it was £1,000 short of the amount I had prayed for. What
to do next? Accept the amount thinking that it was close enough…but that wasn’t
how I had prayed. How did I then know that it was God’s will for me to move?
How to explain to a non-believing estate agent, who was very happy with the
offer and had explained that the prospective buyer—a young girl—had maxed out
her mortgage potential with her offer. How to avoid appearing greedy,
ungrateful or materialistic.
I knew what I had to do, I phoned
the estate agent and explained that although it was a good offer I would have
to decline it. I awkwardly explained that I was a Christian who believed that
God had a plan for my life and that I had been praying for £1,000 more than the
offer. I hoped I didn’t sound ridiculous but knew it must be like
gobble-de-gook to him. I felt like a fraud having disappointed him as my agent
and the potential buyer who had been excited about the property. I was also no
further forward in terms of my own desire to move. Thinking that would be the
end of the matter I hung up the phone. Shortly afterwards I received a call—the
buyer’s parents had added the extra £1,000.
Having agreed the sale, I prayed
for direction then began looking for a property to buy. I viewed a lot of
houses but none of them seemed right. After a while I became aware of a
property that ticked all the boxes and was slightly cheaper than the others I
had seen. The only problem, it kept going on and off the market and seemed to
be in great demand—one sale fell through. The owner was quite specific about
viewing times and wanted it to be immaculate when people were shown around. My
agent promised me that I would be first through the door when it was eventually
made available for viewing.
I finally got in one evening,
loved the house and having been praying throughout the process, made an offer
at full asking price straight away. But there were still another five people,
who had also been clamouring for a chance to view it, lined up to see the
property that evening. I waited with bated breath. The inevitable phone call
came. Someone else had made an offer at full asking price. I needed to make
what’s called a best and final offer—the highest price I was willing to pay.
This would then be compared with the other person’s final offer and the owner
would choose who she wanted to sell her house to. Things are never straight-forward,
are they?
Having no idea what the other
person would offer and not much idea about house valuations it seemed like a
shot in the dark. It wasn’t of course. It was a great test of faith as I really
wanted the house and could’ve offered a lot more than the asking price. But in
the end, I decided only to raise my offer by a reasonable amount, I prayed that if it was God’s will for me to
have the house then my offer would win the “bidding war.” It did and I got the
house.
After a while, I began taking in
lodgers for company and to help pay the mortgage. In 2010, a couple moved in
temporarily as they were looking for rental property in the area. Having lived
with me for a few months they found another property, paid the deposit and
began making arrangements to move.
At that time, I was struggling
with ill-health which was affecting my work as a police officer. I felt that
God might be leading me out of the police—a career I had believed I would stay
in for life. I tentatively looked around for other work and made some
unfruitful enquiries, but it was difficult to focus as I was still working
shifts. If only I could take a break for a few months to recover my health and
seek direction....
Suddenly, my police force changed
their career break policy—I could take a six-month unpaid break. I began
actively looking for secular non-shift work investigating fraud or similar.
Nothing happened. I widened my search to include paid Christian work in England
believing that I couldn’t go abroad with my ill-health and thinking that I didn’t
want to rely on others for financial support. Nothing happened.
A friend suggested I should move from
the South of the country to the Midlands due to having a group of Christian
friends there and an associated church. But, what to do about my house? I
prayed that God would clearly guide me in all of these decisions. The couple
living in my house joked that it was a shame they hadn’t realised earlier that
I might want to leave as they could’ve taken over my house. The thought had
also crossed my mind, but I knew that they were already tied into their contract
with the owners of the house they were moving to. It seemed impossible for
things to change at that late stage…..
The owners of the new house
changed their minds a week before the move was due to take place. They withdrew
from the arrangement for personal reasons. My non-Christian lodgers (they have
since become Christians) said that it felt like things were being taken out of
their hands. They happily agreed to stay in my house, and they remain there six years down the line. I moved temporarily back
to my parents nearby.
I began looking for work and a
property in the Midlands, believing that as God had clearly moved me out of my
house it seemed that He was also leading me to relocate. I couldn’t find work or a house in the
Midlands. My mum then suggested that she had a friend in that area who she
believed would be willing to accommodate me whilst I looked for a more
permanent arrangement. Thinking this would be the final hurdle I waited
excitedly as she made the phone call. The friend said that they were in the
middle of decorating and couldn’t accommodate me! I had been praying that God
would close doors that were wrong, I had to accept that this door had
effectively been closed and that I shouldn't try to break it down.
In total confusion as all avenues
seemed to have reached dead ends, I kept praying. I finally realised that I had
been placing limits on what God would have me do. I opened myself up to the
idea of working abroad and of relying on financial support from others. I began
looking into mission work having had a heart for evangelism since I was saved.
I came across OM Ships and decided to make enquiries with them. (I had been on
a short-term mission with OM in 2007.)
OM initially told me that there
was no space for me on either the orientation weekend that I would need to
attend and perhaps more significantly, their intake for the Logos Hope ship was
also full—I could go to Afghanistan instead! I agreed to their suggestion not
knowing what else to do but continued praying. Someone dropped out of the
orientation weekend, and I was able to take their place. The ship leadership
team then reversed their decision and accepted me to join the ship.
I was going to Logos Hope in
August 2011, but I didn’t have any money and it felt wrong to ask my church for
the full support. I tentatively approached the police and asked them whether I
could return from my six-month career break two months early in order to save
money for a two-year mission trip later that year. Thinking they would
definitely decline as they were also trying to save money which was the reason for
the granting of the short career breaks in the first place, they agreed! I
returned to work for a few months and was able to pay half of my support with
that money.
I approached my church elders
about the trip. They said that they had been praying for someone to go to the
ships as they hadn’t sent anyone to OM for a long time. They agreed to pay the
other half of my support. I joined Logos Hope in August 2011 and finished my
commitment in September 2013.
When I am struggling to
understand God’s will and direction for my life, I look back at these events
and am amazed by His specific guidance. If God wants something to happen it
will happen and if not, it will not. Sure, we make mistakes along the way and deviate
from the path, but even then, God uses those experiences for our good. He brings
us back onto the right path provided we are praying and sincerely desire to do
His will. His will isn’t hidden from us, and He wants us to find it. He guides
us through the Bible, through other people's advice and counsel and sometimes through our circumstances.
We must set our hearts to trust
that He is faithful and that He has a specific plan for each of our lives. The things that we
see as impossibilities are insignificant when compared to God’s mighty power.
Our confusion most often stems from a failure to really trust God and to be
willing to step out in faith believing that He will open and close doors
according to His will. We may not understand what He is doing or why, but we can
know that He is faithful--that His plans for us are good and part of the bigger
picture that only He can see. Let’s keep praying and trusting Him for guidance
and direction in our lives.
Psalm 119 vs 105
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path
Nehemiah 9 vs 19
You, in Your great compassion, Did not forsake them in the wilderness; The pillar of cloud did not leave them by day, To guide them on their way, Nor the pillar of fire by night, to light for them the way in which they were to go.
Proverbs 3 vs 5-6
Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.
Isaiah 30 vs 21
And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, “This is the way, walk in it,” when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left.
Isaiah 55 vs 9
For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Romans 8 vs 28
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path
Nehemiah 9 vs 19
You, in Your great compassion, Did not forsake them in the wilderness; The pillar of cloud did not leave them by day, To guide them on their way, Nor the pillar of fire by night, to light for them the way in which they were to go.
Proverbs 3 vs 5-6
Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.
Isaiah 30 vs 21
And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, “This is the way, walk in it,” when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left.
Isaiah 55 vs 9
For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Romans 8 vs 28
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
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